A glimpse into the life of an introvert

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We all know her…

She sits by herself looking like she doesn’t want to be there.

She’s on her phone and not making eye contact. When you do try to talk to her, she’s not very friendly.

You walk away to talk to people you know better.

Someone remarks about her. Someone else says, “She’s such a _____.” Fill in the blank.

In high school she was a loser or stuck up. Today we might say she thinks she’s better than us. Or a b*^%*^.

Maybe it’s been you. You attend an event where you don’t really know anyone. Small talk isn’t really your thing. You would rather be reading a book or watching Netflix – anything but making idle chit chat with people you barely know. You care about people – it’s just tough to get outside yourself and make those early connections.

Where are you in these examples?

Did you see yourself in one of these? I’m definitely the second one! New situations drive me crazy. I’d rather discuss Trump than make small talk. I would rather jump right into knowing someone than work through the, “Where do you live?” “What do you do for a living?” “Do you have kids?” conversations.

All during my school years people said I was stuck up and that I thought I was better than everyone else. I really didn’t – I just didn’t connect well every time. Rather, I feel deeply and small talk is too superficial for me.

It took me years to realize that despite my ability to give a speech to thousands of people, I’m an introvert. And I’m okay.

Introvert truths

It doesn’t mean I don’t know how to talk to others. Just that it drains me. I am NOT energized by a day of talking to people…even though I specialize in how to do it.

Introverts often know how to talk to people. Contrary to popular belief, they aren’t necessarily shy or lonely.

They just don’t like it – it doesn’t come natural to them.

Introverts want to get to know people, they just don’t love the process.

They have lots of good things to say and are quite likely very intelligent. You just have to crack that outer layer to get to those qualities.

Next time

So, the next time you are at an event and see “her” sitting by herself, bring her a coffee and ask about her favorite Netflix show or book she’s been reading. Ask if she likes to bake or what she does for hobbies.

Try moving beyond the small talk nonsense and you may just begin to see the real woman lurking under the seemingly shy exterior.

She’s not trying to be rude – she’s just trying to be herself in a sea of extroverts.

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Introvert Resources

1.I own this book and it’s wonderful. I love that it highlights the value of being an introvert since they, too, have a lot to offer. Quiet, The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking.

2. Introverts are often thought of as followers but they can make very strong leaders. This book shows introverts how to work with their natural tendencies instead of fighting them. Quiet Voice Fearless Leader: 10 Principles For Introverts To Awaken The Leader Inside

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Blessings,

🌸 Andrea

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