How will you spend time with your kids?

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Bonding while fishing

It was a cool January morning when my oldest son and I bundled up, loaded up his truck, and headed to a local lake to spend time together. The sun was up but not sweltering (a blessing in Florida). We tried at two different lakes but had no luck catching any fish. We did catch a lot of conversation, though. He talked about school and friends. I mostly listened and asked the occasional question. I wouldn’t trade that two hours for anything, though.

Spending time with our kids, uninterrupted, is precious for everyone. Our kids will always remember it and it gives parents a good opportunity to get a glimpse into our kids’ lives.

Sometimes that glimpse is just a new interest or something funny at school. Every bit helps when it comes to connecting with our kids!

Family game night is an easy way to spend relaxed time together – and it’s fun for all ages!

Ice Cream Bundle for the Bosch Universal Plus Mixer/Artiste Mixer

Now is a great time to start planning one thing you will do this weekend to connect.

Find someone and plan fun!

Even if you don’t have kids of your own, maybe you have a niece or nephew – I’m sure they would love to spend time with you! You may want to plan a family event, or something one-on-one with just one child, if that works for your family.

Your “do something” doesn’t have to be a fancy affair. And maybe fishing or board games aren’t your thing.

Don’t know what to do? Start here

Here’s a list of some ideas to get you started thinking about how to spend time with your child:

• Watch a show or movie together. My kids and I have a couple of shows we watch when we can steal an hour or two.
• Garden together. My mom and I bonded for years over this activity.
• Bake, cook, grill something together. Another bonding experience with my mom when I was a young girl.
• Grab a coffee at your local coffee shop.
• Go fishing.
• Go swimming.
• Take out or rent a kayak or canoe.
• Take a tour of a local attraction – be a tourist!
• Play tennis – or baseball – or frisbee.
• Go for a walk.
• Have lunch at a restaurant.
• Play a game. Here are some of our faves. Check that out if you are at a loss.
• Go visit a local park and be kids again at the playground.
• Plan for summer activities.
• Color together.
• Draw with sidewalk chalk.
• Ride bikes.
• Read together – even older kids enjoy reading books they remember from when they were little.
• Take a prayer walk through the neighborhood – start with yours.
• Put up hammocks and find cloud formations.

I hope this gets you off to a good start. It really doesn’t matter what you do – just plan something and then DO IT!

Communication reminders:

• Let your child know you’ll be doing something together. Some kids don’t like ambiguity so a surprise may not be well received. Know your child’s preferences and respect them.
• If your family shares a calendar, make sure it’s in there so it’s an actual “event.”
• Don’t invite anyone else – this is to spend time as a family.
• Don’t force conversation. Silence is okay. Some people, especially guys, DO things side by side and have periods of silence.
• When your child says something, listen.
• Resist the temptation to coach, lead, or lecture. It’s about being together, not giving a lesson.
• Ask questions, and try to keep them open-ended. I’ll ask things like,
  • “What happened next?”
  • “What did she do when X happened?”
  • What did you think about that?”
  • “What would you have done in that situation?”
  • “How do you feel about that?”
  • “What do you think about that?”
• The answers to the questions are important, but not THE most important thing. Your goal is just to learn about your child. That’s it. No lessons or lectures!
• If you’re shocked, hide it. Sometimes they say things to see how you’ll respond. Take it in stride and be shocked later with your spouse behind closed doors.
• Finally, lead by example – turn your phone on silent and don’t check it or get on social media. Pictures are okay, but that’s about it.

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Most of all, HAVE FUN!

🌸 Andrea