One Simple Step When Marriage Is Hard

I’ve you’ve been married longer than say, two days, you know that marriage is hard. But I’m here to tell you that marriage is worth the effort!

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Marriage is hard

I’ve been married nearly 29 years. It’s been amazing…and difficult. I know God wants the best for us and I know He wants us to stay together. But some days it’s tough, you know?

We’re so very different. He’s always listening to shows (sometimes two programs at once) while I prefer silence. He doesn’t clean out the sinks when he does dishes. He piles his clothes instead of putting them away. He’s often silent, even when I ask questions.

And yet. I’m not that easy, either. I love silence and I know that drives him crazy. To help, I’ll put on a movie I know well (so I can tune it out) but there’s still noise in the house for him. I can be crazy about the kitchen being just right at night, to the point that I’m up late taking care of it. I try to be grateful when he wants to help with the dishes, even though it’s not done the way I would do it. Sometimes laundry takes me a few days to push all the way through, even when I try my best to get it all done in one day. My husband is a thinker and that’s one thing I fell in love with. I try to remember that when I’m met with silence after I ask a question.

Tell him/her what you love

Proverbs 10:12 tells us that hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses.

Instead of ruminating about all the things that bug you in your marriage, spend time today remembering why you fell in love.

My husband is not only a thinker, but he can fix anything. He’s also very affectionate and I know he loves me dearly. He also thinks I’m still attractive after all these years (and two kids). He’s a hard worker and will help a friend any time they ask.

Our marriage is improved when I remember all these things that I love. If I focus on the good, it crowds out those pesky frustrations that really don’t mean anything in the grand scheme of things. By focusing on the good, I’m on the lookout for more good. I become intentional about finding the good, loving parts of my husband every day.

Want to take it one step further? Tell your spouse tonight at dinner or before bed. This doesn’t have to be some big long message. Just tell him something you love about him. He will love to hear it, I promise!

Want some more ideas? Here are 5 simple steps to improve your marriage.

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Be well,

Andrea

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