10 Biblical Marriage Principles for Christian Wives

I knew my husband was Mr. Right pretty early in our relationship. While I wasn’t concerned with biblical marriage principles back then, I wish I had been. I wish that I knew then what I know now about what God wants for our marriages. These biblical principles of marriage are good for a lifetime of love and togetherness and complement these biblical truths about marriage well. Grounded in Scripture, you’ll find the Truth you’ve been looking for in your marriage.

History of man and woman

Genesis 2 outlines the history of creating man and woman. God created Adam and decided it wasn’t good for him to be alone. So he put Adam into a deep sleep, took out a rib, and created the woman from Adam’s rib. Verse 23 says, “At last!” the man exclaimed. “This one is bone from my bone, and flesh from my flesh! She will be called ‘woman,’ because she was taken from ‘man.’” God declared that for this reason men will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife.

Woman was literally made from man and for man. That’s a pretty heavy responsibility. We are part of them and for their good. We serve a unique purpose in our marriage.

Principle #1 – Role of Wives – we are made for our husbands in a relationship that reflects God’s love for the Church.

Women are made on purpose, for a purpose, in their marriages.

God made us to be a helper for our husbands. Being a helper means we support our spouse. We contribute to his life in a meaningful way.

History of marriage in Bible

The Bible is full of stories about marriages, and I could write a book evaluating all of them. For now, I’ll highlight a few of them to uncover various biblical marriage principes for us to model our marriages after.

Here are five classic biblical marriages that offer powerful lessons in marriage principles:

Adam and Eve (Genesis 2-3)

Principle #2: Unity and Accountability 

Adam and Eve were the first married couple, literally the first embodiment of the institution of marriage, and representing the “one flesh” principle of unity and partnership in marriage. They also represent the “one man, one woman” truth of marriage. They wandered from God and sinned, but they stayed together and build the human race. Adam and Eve were still accountable to God from their sin, but God still loved them and guided them.  Their story shows the importance of accountability and staying aligned with God’s will to prevent division. Despite their mistakes, they remained together and continued God’s plan for humanity, showing that couples can overcome challenges through unity and shared faith.

Abraham and Sarah (Genesis 12-21)

Principle #3:  Patience and Trust in God’s Timing 

Abraham and Sarah have a fascinating story. They faced many obstacles, including infertility and long waits for God’s promises to be fulfilled. Abraham lied about their marriage (twice!) and there were consequences for those actions. He was also convinced by Sarah to have a baby with her servant, and they faced consequences for those actions, too.  Their story teaches that patience, faith, and reliance on God’s timing are essential in marriage. Even through doubt, they learned to trust God’s plan, which ultimately blessed their union and blessed all followers through time after them.

Isaac and Rebekah (Genesis 24-27)

Principle #4: Prayer and Trust in God’s Guidance 

Abraham’s servant prayed for God’s direction in finding a wife for Isaac, and Rebekah was chosen. Isaac and Rebekah’s marriage was founded on prayer and God’s guidance. While it took a very long time for them to finally marry, their story emphasizes seeking God’s will in marriage decisions and allowing Him to guide relationships. Another example of less-than-perfect individuals united in a common goal, Isaac and Rebekah demonstrate that steadfastness and prayer are essential for marriage. Isaac and Rebekah are also great role models for hard times. Not only did they have challenges before their marriage, but they had trouble once kids started coming, too.

Ruth and Boaz (Ruth 1-4)

Principle #5: Kindness and Redemption 

The marriage of Ruth and Boaz is one of my all-time favorites. Their relationship illustrates the power of kindness, loyalty, and redemptive love. Boaz’s protection and kindness toward Ruth and her family demonstrate how mutual respect and care can lead to a deeply loving relationship. Their union also symbolizes God’s redemptive love and provision, even in hardship. Boaz’s redemption of Ruth is a symbol of the redemption we receive from Jesus Christ. Just as he redeemed Ruth from dire straits, so we are redeemed from our own sinful lives and fallen world.

Priscilla and Aquila (Acts 18)

Principle #6: Partnership in Faith and Ministry 

Moving to the New Testament, Priscilla and Aquila were a married couple who served alongside Paul in ministry, showing the strength of a marriage grounded in shared faith and purpose. Their partnership in ministry demonstrates the power of a couple who work together to serve God, support each other’s callings, and strengthen the church. While this model seems tough to emulate, it’s a valuable goal.

Each of these couples faced unique challenges but relied on biblical principles to navigate them, providing timeless lessons for strengthening marriages today.

God’s design for physical relationship in marriage

God planned a unique relationship with marriage. Sexual intimacy is supposed to be unique to marriage. It’s a bond that only two people can share that is reserved for uniting the two people as one. Our sexual relationships are sacred ones, designed for marriage.

Not only is sex designed for marriage, but we are to actually enjoy it! Yes, we are supposed to enjoy this type of connection with our spouse regularly. Paul admonishes us not to withhold sexual intercourse “except for a time, with fasting and prayer” (1 Corinthians 7:5-7).  By this means that there may be times we agree together to abstain, generally as part of a fasting program when we are in deep prayer about an issue, but that we should then come together again so that we aren’t weak and open to Satan’s tempting.

Principle #7: Sexual intimacy is a blessing for marriage and should be honored

I’ll be honest, communication is my area of expertise, not Christian marital sexual intimacy. Here’s a list of articles from Focus on the Family about the topic. I encourage you to speak openly with your spouse about your sexual life and learn all you can about how to make it a healthy one!

Challenges in Marriage

Marriage, like all of life, includes challenges.  My 30-year marriage has included small challenges like crumbs on the counter and socks on the floor as well as larger challenges like having a long-distance marriage and money conflicts. Yet we’ve managed to navigate them all – some with more success than others.

Trouble

Jesus tells us that in this world we will have trouble. Strong marriages do not mean trouble-free marriages. Rather, they are a reflection of years of hard work! Effective communication is the key to overcoming challenges in marriage. Having good conflict management techniques and honest communication go a long way to ultimate fulfillment in marriage. Active listening is  another skill that cannot be overstated.

Knowing God’s word is a good place to start with addressing challenges in marriage. When we read and study the Bible we draw closer to God and understand His will for our lives. Seeing the world through God’s eyes gives us a whole new perspective on marriage. We realize that a healthy marriage is one that reflects God’s love. That fact leads us to our next biblical principle of marriage.

Principle 8: Challenges in marriage give us an opportunity to unite and respond to each other as God responds to us individually.

The marital relationship can be tough, but challenges also give us a chance to grow closer to each other and to God. When we face struggles in marriage, it’s an opportunity to show love, patience, and grace—just like God shows to us every day. God doesn’t give up on us when we make mistakes or fall short. Instead, He responds with kindness, forgiveness, and unconditional love.

Turn it Around

As wives, we can reflect that same attitude toward our husbands. Instead of seeing challenges as reasons to pull away or get frustrated, we can choose to work together, support each other, and strengthen our relationship. It’s not easy, I know. But these moments help us grow not only as a couple but also in our faith, as we learn to trust God to guide us and give us the wisdom to love as He loves. By responding to our husbands with God’s grace and love, we create a strong marriage that mirrors His goodness and brings us closer to Him. If you are struggling with conflict in your marriage, here are some verses that may help.

Communication

Scripture tells us that “the tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit” (Proverbs 18:21). Communication is key to a healthy, strong, successful marriage! Not only does this type of marriage require unwavering commitment, but it requires a firm foundation of solid communication. This aspect of a Christian marriage cannot be overstated. Even though I study and teach about communication, it’s still a skill my husband and I work on daily. We’re never done learning how to relate to each other better.

You’ve taken a great first step to improve your communication by coming to my website. Here you’ll find lots of practical tips for communication and your faith for your entire family.  

Principle #9: Learning to control what you say and communicate biblically will help you strengthen your marriage.

Self-control is a big part of effective communication. If we want a healthy marriage, we can’t say everything that comes to mind! We have to take all our thoughts to God and let Him tell us which ones we need to share with our spouse. Sometimes we aren’t sure what to talk about with our spouse, and that’s okay. Ask God and He will tell you what’s most important,

Types of love

There are lots of types of love and several love languages. Love languages were originally discussed by Gary Chapman, and he has more books than one can imagine for every type of relationship! To put it simply, love languages include quality time, acts of service, physical touch, receiving gifts, and words of affirmation. You can take this quiz to see what your love language is.   

When we know our spouse’s love language, we can communicate with him/her much more clearly because they will understand what we are saying at a deeper level. We can begin to tailor our messages to our partner’s way of feeling love.

Principle #10: Knowing our spouse’s love language will strengthen our communication and our relationship.

Knowing your spouse’s love language can make a big difference in your Christian marriage because it helps you show love in a way that truly matters to them. Just as God loves each of us uniquely, we can learn to love our spouse in a way that speaks to their heart. When you understand what makes your partner feel valued—whether it’s words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, receiving gifts, or physical touch—you can show love in a way that connects deeply. This strengthens your bond, reduces misunderstandings, and helps your marriage reflect the love and unity God desires for you both.

Even if you have an unbelieving spouse, you can use love languages to communicate in a way that your partner will understand and then feel more loved. And we all want to feel loved!

There you have it – 10 biblical marriage principles for Christian wives.  Which one do you find easiest in your marriage? Let us know in the comments!

With love,

🌸 Andrea

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